You're listening to Episode 32 of the Sustainable Parenting Podcast. Hello and welcome to the Sustainable Parenting Podcast. Let me tell you, friend, this place is different. We fill that gap between gentle parenting and harsh discipline that's really missing to parent with kindness and firmness at the same time.
And give you the exact steps to be able to parent in ways that are more realistic and effective. And for that reason, finally, feel sustainable. Welcome.
We are talking today about how to get your kids to listen in 10 seconds or less. And that's a pretty big deal, right? So, many people told me like, Uh, getting kids to listen is one of the top things that I would love to see change for. If that is you, would [00:01:00] you write the words? Get them to listen, because I want others to know they're not alone by seeing you step into this, um, phrase.
And I can promise you I hear this as probably 50 percent of the parents that work with me in parent coaching. Like, I just don't get it. Why won't they listen? And the good news is this is something we really can change. And when I say like, we can do this in 10 seconds or less, it's really possible if you're like, Oh, I've tried everything.
Friend, I want to say to you, you probably haven't been trying the full CEO model. As we talked about yesterday, It's very easy to get into advice all over the internet. That's only giving you tools for the cuckoo cycle, commands, ways to say it gently and nicely and explain, and then consequences when they won't listen.
And I want to broaden your tool belt with tools of CEO that we [00:02:00] call the unique, um, effective process in sustainable parenting that sustainable parents are using this and it helps you be consistent, helps the kids to actually listen and be cooperative, and it helps you to stay calm. Anyone love to have those three things?
More consistency, the kids listening, and you staying calm? Please say the words yes below, so I know that you're with me here, and that this is something that we're getting it right. This is what you're looking for today.
Okay, and just a few logistics. I want to shout out our winners. For the coffee gift cards today. Remember when you comment, it enters you to be qualified to win a coffee gift card the next day. So make sure you're commenting, you're liking other people's comments, and you're interacting with us here on the workshop.
The winners from yesterday's interactions live and replay are Ashley Pearson. Abanda Menzel, and Angela Hoffman. [00:03:00] So send me a message so that I can get your email and get that Starbucks coffee gift card sent right over to you. Alright friends, let's dive into how do we get this to be better. And first it says on your handout, Greta's story.
I want to share with you one of the clients Greta said to me when she first came to work with me, Ugh, we were, we're just so stuck in negative behavior. I'm feeling super angry and powerless. and like I'm failing my two girls.
Can you relate?
And what I'm happy to say that she said, using the tool that you're going to get from today, by the end of our work together and this tool included in the CEO process, she said, gosh, I now see how we were stuck in negative behavior. And, and me feeling powerless, hopeless, and frustrated. [00:04:00] And I'm so happy to be seeing that we got out of it and that I now feel that power as a mom that I was missing.
I just didn't really know. how to do that. How to be the powerful leader in our family. And it really has transformed everything in how I feel towards our girls, how I feel when they get upset, how I feel about myself and my ability to get them to do what I'm asking. So friend, this is what I want to give you today.
I want you to have that very same reality as Greta, and it's super possible. What likely is happening is without realizing it and with the best of intentions, you have been stuck in that cuckoo cycle and likely encouraging your children to resist. What You're Asking Them To Do. This is not about shame and blame.
This is about trying to help you notice, like, [00:05:00] friend, I see you there, trying to get that screw in the wall, um, so you can hang your pretty picture, but like, it's not gonna work with a hammer. This is my goal today, is help you to realize, oh my gosh, yes, of course they're not listening, cause I'm using a tool that kinda pushes their resistance, and might even be encouraging the resistance.
without realizing it. And this is not your fault. It's because this is a different language that we can learn to speak that's more effective. Flora, what are you talking about? I want you to stand in your kids shoes for a moment. Look out their eyeballs and notice what you find yourself thinking, feeling, or deciding when I say these words.
Okay? This is noticing how you would feel just genuinely standing in their shoes when you hear these words. Go brush your teeth. [00:06:00] Get on your coat. Get upstairs for bath time.
Stop doing that to your brother. Get your dishes over here. Stop whining. Pick up your toys.
Friend, what do you notice yourself thinking, feeling, Or deciding standing in your kid's shoes.
Comment below.
Yes.
Right. It's like you notice that you are like, I don't want to do that thing. Like Margot says, it's like a lack of choice or control. And how does that [00:07:00] feel if that's your thought, Margot? Gosh, it seems like I don't have any control. I don't have any choices here. How does that feel? And what does that encourage you to be noticing that you're tempted to do?
Can't wait to see you next week. And as always, take this week as a new opportunity to parent with kindness and firmness at the same time so that parenting can finally feel sustainable. See you soon.